The Father 100 - Episode 2

Graphic by Chris @ Daddy Doctrines

Last week we began a new feature here at The Chalkboard, The Father 100. The idea was to have dads and moms who own a blog write a one hundred word piece on a given word. 

I was psyched to have seventeen awesome dads and one awesome mom step up to the plate and show their writing chops off for the world to see. The posts on the word love were touching, funny, heartfelt, and best of all, well written.

I hope everyone who jumped in last week jumps in again and that we get more moms and dads to join us.

Wanna join us? Here's how...

The rules are simple. I will give you a word. Yes, that's right a word. As in one. Single. The cheese stands alone...you get the point.

You will have between now and midnight on Friday to write a one hundred word post inspired by that word. Entries can be less than one hundred words, but they cannot be more. Posts must focus on some aspect of marriage or parenting. Even though I call this the Father 100, moms are encouraged to join us!

Ninety words? Cool.

Ninety-eight? Awesome.

One hundred two? Sorry chief.

One hundred words (or less).

Write your post on your blog and then add your link to the linky tools below, just like for Father Friday.

Sometime over the course of the weekend I will read all the entries. Then I will pick the entry that I feel best does justice to the spirit of the given word. Some weeks I will have a guest do the judging so I can play as well.

This exercise is strictly for fun and also for good writing practice. As of this time no prizes will be offered. Should I win the lottery or score a successful reality series (Real Dads of Delaware...can you see it?) that may change, but for now the chosen author will have to content himself with the prideful swell of a job well done.

I think this can be a lot of fun. Who is in?

This week's word is...

FORGIVENESS

OK writers...write...

Prayer of a Teacher - 2010 Redux

Well, summer 2010 has come to a close. A new batch of students will be coming to my room tomorrow. I was going to write a post about what I am thinking and feeling today but then I read back through the post I wrote last year at this time. It basically said everything I am feeling so I am just going to reprint it here, with a few changes.

When I read through it I realized I owe the entire eastern seaboard an apology. When I mentioned the hope for a "few days of heavy snow sprinkled in just for fun" I did not realize I was opening the floodgates on feet and feet of heavy snow, the likes of which we had never before seen (my back is STILL sore from all the shoveling). So...sorry everyone...my bad.

For your consideration...

 Prayer of a Teacher - 2010 Redux.

Today is an anxious day in the life of a teacher.

The room is set up, copies are made, planning has been done. 

Tomorrow is zero hour.

Tomorrow, the kids come.

Many teachers I know spend this day wandering around in a kind of trance, hoping the year they are about to embark on is a good one. Good students who come to class bright eyed, bushy tailed, and eager to learn. Excellent parents who share your educational philosophy to the letter, who show up, ON TIME, to every conference and dance through the halls, singing your praises so loud the principal cannot help but join in the joyous refrain. Test scores so high Oprah herself will take notice and have you as a guest on her show to share your wisdom with the masses. And who wouldn't want a few days worth of heavy snow sprinkled in just for fun (but NO BLIZZARDS!).

These lofty aspirations aside, we all hope for a good, positive year.

In fact teachers so fervently hope for a successful year that they engage in many activities the day before the year begins to give themselves a leg up, an edge to push them past everyone else.

These have been theorized by some, guessed at by others, and were even predicted by the great prophet Nostradamus.

They have never been revealed outside of the hallowed halls of academia.

Until now.

So...what can you as a teacher do the night before school starts to ensure a smooth, successful year?

- Make sure your years supply of Prozac is filled.

- Spend the day watching Freedom Writers, Mr. Holland's Opus, Dangerous Minds, Akelah and the Bee, Lean on Me, Dead Poets Society, or any othercompletely true to life Hollywood film made about teachers that will make you feel that your year will turn out EXACTLY like them. After you have had a good laugh at this suggestion, move on.

- Obsessively plan out your entire year. Then plan a back up year. Then plan a back up for your back up. Ensure that all back up plans are completely structurally supported by the state standards. Email copies to your principal, the PTA president, and the Head of the Board.

- Sacrifice 50 spotless bulls and 20 virgins to the god Odin that he may bless your endeavors with strength and victory. (This one is very difficult to pull off due to the fact that it is easier to find 50 bulls than it is to find 20 virgins these days. I blame Baywatch.)

- Consume as much alcohol as is humanly possible so that, no matter how devastatingly hung over you are for the start of school in the morning, the year can only get better.

- Spend the entire day at the pool or beach in complete and total denial that summer is over. When a friend makes a joke that you have to go back to real work in the morning, pants them and shove them in the water.

- Lay on your living room floor, tucked into a protective, fetal ball, drooling and mumbling until your spouse kicks you and sends you up to bed.

As you can see, there are many things a teacher can do to ensure a smooth and productive year.

I am, of course, kidding (except for the comment about how much easier it is to find bulls instead of virgins). It is true however that the night before a new school year begins is one filled with nervous anticipation and, hopefully, excitement.

I have a simple routine I follow, and after many years in education, it seems to work pretty well.

After spending a fun day with my family (The Wife is a teacher as well...The Peanut wants to be a teacher some day, as well as a presidential, soccer playing, policewoman firefighting violinist) I will read for a bit and then turn off the lights. Before I glide into the deep waters of sleep, I pray.

I pray for patience. I need to remember that each student is a unique individual. Like fingerprints, no two students are exactly alike. Each comes to me at a different stage of development, academically and socially. It is unreasonable to want them all to be at the same level just because it would make my life easier. I need to do the best I can for each student where they are.

I pray for energy. I know that I am the single most important influence in my classroom when it comes to setting the mood. If I am happy, upbeat, and enthusiastic I increase the odds for that energy to permeate into my students. Likewise, if I am negative, sour, or tired the same will occur. Like a hot air balloonist, I have much control over how inflated or deflated we all are.

I pray for sensitivity. Twenty-five human lives from twenty-five different backgrounds, religions, and home situations will come to me. They will look to me to understand them, to give them acceptance, validation, and support. I need to remember that just because someone did not grow up with what I had or was not raised the way I was, that does not make me superior to them. I need to accept and care for my students where they are when they come to me. I also need to be open to the things I can learn from my students on a daily basis.

I pray for compassion. Some of my families are single parent. Some of my students are being raised by their grandparents. Some are the oldest and the responsibility for raising their younger siblings falls to them because mom or dad work multiple jobs just to make ends meet. Some are going through active divorce proceedings. Some are coping with difficult custody arrangements from past divorce proceedings. Some are coping with life situations that are so terrible and confusing that I as a thirty-five year old adult would struggle to comprehend them. These children come to my door each day and are expected to learn. I must remember that some days this will be easier for them than others.

I pray for wisdom. I know I will make mistakes. It is an inevitable by-product of the human condition. I pray for the wisdom to minimize my mistakes. I also pray for the wisdom to learn from the ones I will make.

I pray for endurance. A school year is a marathon, one run no matter what the conditions are like. I need to be mindful that I must remain as strong on the last day of school as I plan to be on the first. There are parts of the year that pass with the ease of a down hill race. I pray that I do not get complacent at those times. But there are also times of a school year that pass with the gut wrenching agony of an uphill race. I pray that my energy will not fail me when I need it most.

I pray for my colleagues. Though a school may be comprised of a multitude of individual classrooms, it is a community. I need to remember that the other adults in my building will be just as nervous, just as excited, just as fallible as I will be. I pray that I can be an asset and encouragement to my fellow teachers, that I will reach out to them when they are in need. I also pray that I in turn will reach out to them when I find myself in need of assistance.

Lastly, I pray that when my students leave my room that I will have made as much of an impact on their lives as I know they will make on my own. There has not been a year that has passed by where a class has not taught me a multitude of things about myself and the way I view the world, for good or for ill. I will always be indebted to my students and their families for the things they have taught me.

These things I will pray. Then, I will sleep.

At some point in the night my clinically insane beagle will shove her cold, wet nose into the small of my back. And some time after that, as the sun begins to rise, The Peanut will pad not-so-softly into our room and hop into bed with us, snuggling in between us. I will lay there for a bit, savoring the preview of heaven that comes from having my dearest ones so close.

Then my feet will hit the floor...and another school year will begin.

The First Father 100 Winner

Holy advanced calculus Batman!

This was wayyyyyyyy harder than I thought it was going to be. Seventeen awesome blogging dads and one awesome blogging mom took up the challenge to write a one hundred word or less piece of flash NON-fiction inspired by the word LOVE.

Let me tell ya...these dudes and dudette are awesome! I have sat here this evening, for over an hour, reading and re-reading the wisdom, compassion, and excellence that have poured forth from the pens of these eighteen writers. If you haven't read them all go do it. You will thank me for pointing you to them.

I did say I would single out the post that most spoke to me each week. And while they ALL did on one level or another, the effort turned in by Dr. Shawn over at These Are My Footprints In The Sand spoke to me the most.

Enjoy his piece, then go visit his blog for more of the same. Then go visit the blogs of the other seventeen participants. What I had hoped would happen has begun to happen. We are showing the world that these dads and mom can write with skill and precision. Enjoy Dr. Shawn's piece and please join us Wednesday for another round of The Father 100!

I do.

I will.

I promise to.

God gives it.

We all deserve it.

Our children show it.

Our children require it.

It must be unconditional.

Grace can be found there.

Mercy is given birth by it.

Endless nights of teething, worry, teenage years.

Puff, Smurfs, Barney, Blue, Hannah Montana, Bieber Fever OY!

Crawl, waddle, step, crash, tantrum, crash, step, crash, TANTRUM!!

Birth

Cry

Sleeping entire night

Teething

Babble, walk, talk

Preschool

Cheer

Homerun

First Kiss

Drive

Date

Graduation

College

Marriage

Then it’s goodbye as they begin their own.

Fast, flash

Daddy…

LOVE…them as if there is no tomorrow.

Thank you to all who participated! I hope to see you back on Wednesday for the new word!

                                                       -Brian     

                                                         (Chalkboard Dad)                      

Guys, Are We Brave Enough to be Real Husbands?

The Internet is an amazing thing. Scary, dangerous, and a time suck of epic proportions (thanks for nothing Al Gore), but for the most part it is the best thing since sliced bread. Back in June I picked my old blog up off the floor where it had sat, abandoned, for almost a year. I dusted her off, pulling off two old gummy bears and some stringy spider webs and began to once again spend my evenings listening to the voices in my head and writing down what they tell me.

Through the site Dad-Blogs and later the hashtag #DadsTalking on Twitter I have met some really outstanding dads. Men who write amazing things about the awesome privilege we have been given that we should be called dad. Many of these fine, upstanding gentleman are listed in my blog roll under the Awesome Parent Blogs section and I am adding more daily. When you are finished here, jump over there and check some of these guys out. You will not consider your time wasted.

Today on Twitter @TedRubin linked to a post from early July by one of those dad bloggers, @DadStreet. It was a great post about how a guy's priorities shift when he becomes a father from "Am I a MANLY MAN?" to "Am I a GOOD DAD?". It is an awesome post that you can find by clicking here. Go ahead and read it. No, really...I'll wait here for you. I have a good book to read and a nice glass of Sebeka to drink...I will be here when you finish.

Welcome back. See, I told you it was a good post. I read it earlier today and it got me thinking about the importance of our role on Earth as fathers. I could only think of one other role that I think is just as important and that is our role as husbands (for those to whom that classification applies). So, in the spirit of Dad Street, I decided to make my own list.

A list about what it means to be a "Real Husband". Here goes...

- After your wife has had a rough day, taking her shoes off and rubbing her feet, WITHOUT having to be asked to do so.

- Being a considerate person and doing the little things, like leaving the toilet seat down. It seems like such a small thing to us guys but if you do it on a consistent basis it shows how considerate you are. Let's face it. What guy really cares if the seat is up OR down?

- Actually picking up a pen or pencil and writing notes to your wife, they way you did in the beginning. It doesn't even have to be anything elaborate or verbose. Simple declarations of your love will work just fine, a reminder about how amazing she is as a mother. A Post It note left on the bathroom mirror, a note slipped into her lunch, a mailed letter, from you. All expressions that show you care enough to invest time in letting your wife know how crazy you are about her.

- Buying your wife some flowers or something nice, not because you screwed up, but because you want her to know how thankful you are that she settled for a shlub like you and that you still see everyday how incredible she is.

- Opening the car door for her. I know it's not 1950, but if you did it when you were dating or trying to impress, then you damn well should still do it now.

- Watching something on TV she asks you to watch, even if it seems to you like you would rather see the TV exploded at the bottom of a quarry in flames rather than sit and watch it. You don't have to tell your buddies that you watched the Beverly Hills 90210 Reunion Special last night. Don't ask, don't tell applies here. (The one exception to this rule is reality television. Shows like Jersey Shore or Real Housewives should not be watched under any circumstance)

- Helping with your share of the household chores. Laundry, vacuuming, cooking. You live there...pull your weight.

- Telling her you love her before she reminds you to say it by telling you.

- Encouraging her to go out with her girlfriends for some girl time more than once a year. Come on dad, you can take care of the kids without the house blowing up. Don't buy the crap the media sells you about fathers being simple minded buffoons who can't do something as simple as watch over their own offspring. Hollywood thinks it's funny. I don't.

- Being there and wanting to be there. There's nothing wrong with going out with your buddies from time to time, but if you are out every weekend, or several nights a week and you leave her home with the kids, what kind of message are you sending about your priorities? Both to her AND to your children...

- Making time to go out on dates, just the two of you. I know the phrase "date night" has become a bit of a cliche, but the idea behind it is still important. And don't leave all the arrangements to her. You are an intelligent guy. You can arrange the babysitting and make the reservations. In the meat grinder that is life, it is important to make the time to be alone.

- Realizing that there is more to foreplay than asking "Hey, you ready yet?" Just saying...

- Not going to bed angry or with unresolved issues between each other. The Bible says it nicely when it advises "not to let the sun go down on your anger." Really...life is too short and too unpredictable to have unresolved issues between yourselves.

- Listening to her, instead of trying to solve all of her concerns with a snap of your magic man fingers so you can go back  to what's on the television. Sometimes, all she wants is someone to listen.

This is by no means an exhaustive list. And by no means am I trying to imply by publishing it that I am the Mount Everest of husbands because I do all these things on a regular basis. I do not, just ask The Wife and, after she stops laughing, she will fill you in.

But it is a list I want to strive to adhere to, much as @DadStreet's list is one I strive to adhere to.

Any dads reading this, please add any points you feel I left out (there are hundreds) in the comment section below. I would be interested to see what kind of list we could all collaborate and produce.

Men, the two greatest treasures we are given in this life are our spouse and our children. We should be willing to fight our way through hell and back to ensure that they know just how precious they really are to us.

One Hundred Word Challenge - Corridor

The prompt for this week's flash fiction over at Velvet Verbosity is corridor. The task was to write one hundred words inspired by that word. Here's my go...

The Walk

The condemned shuffles down the corridor, head bowed, thoughts on what awaits him at its end. Bright fluorescents overhead throw their harsh light down as he walks and considers the sequence of events that brought him to this place. 

He shakes his head, wishing with all his being that he could take it back. Anger got the best of him and when the red mist filled his vision, he knows that he lost control.

He comes to the end. Looks up.

'This is it,' he thinks. 'My life is over.'

He opens the door marked Principal's Office and trudges inside.

Father Friday3 - Best of the Week from Blogger Dads.

Graphic by Chris @ Daddy Doctrines

Week three. Almost a month.

We increased our numbers last week which is good. Would like to see the numbers climb higher and higher.

This has been a busy week for me, getting the classroom all ready to receive eager new minds on Monday. Found time to write a bit, but not nearly as much as I would have liked. I am also depressed because, once more this year, my Phillies have suddenly forgot simple fundamentals like hitting and base running.

So I am counting on you dad and mom bloggers out there to give us your best from this week so I can cheer up in this, my last weekend before another school year starts. At  least for a little while before we play San Diego this week.

So...the rules...


 1. You need to be a father. New father, old father, soon to be father, want some day to be a father, father...doesn't matter. You just need to be a dad. (Or a really awesome mom!)

2. You must own and maintain your own blog.

3. If you meet the requirements for rules one and two, look back over your posts from the past week, from Friday to Friday. Re-read them all.

4. Choose the post you feel was your particular BEST for the week. It can be funny, helpful, sad, dramatic, deep, light...whatever. Pick the post that most reflects you and what your awesome blog has to offer.

5. Follow the host. That's me. It's quick and painless and I always follow back. (This part is optional, but oh so appreciated!)

6. Put your blog address and a short description of the post in the Linky link located below. Be short but concise. (You know...like twitter!)

7. After you are on the list, surf the posts of the other dads and follow as many as you can. Read and above all else COMMENT! We all know that comments are to bloggers what a keg of Dear Park water is to a desert nomad.

8. Grab the code below, create a new post on your blog, and enter it so you can share the growing list with all your followers. Then just sit back and let it grow!

Don't forget to share the link to this post. Via Twitter, Email, IM, or carrier pigeon. The more moms and dad we can get to link up, the more we can influence our corner of the web for good, positive, humorous parenting.

 

My Father 100 Post - LOVE

Well I can't enter the contest because I am judging and impartiality has always been kinda hard for me, but I still wanted to write.

So I offer this purely for enjoyment's sake...

My Daughter

Your smile, rays of sunshine given flesh.

Your laugh, a sound of joy so pure, nothing on this earth can darken it.

Your hugs, the very embrace of the divine.

Your sense of humor, quirky and incredibly original.

Your respect, a treasure I desire never to lose or tarnish.

Your eyes, luminous windows to your soul.

Your unconditional love, a rock upon which I can set my back to fight any battle that comes our way.

Your compassion, as selfless as it is unending.

These my daughter are but a handful of the multitude of things I love about you.

When a Nobody Tries to be a Somebody (Scott Barry)

SOURCE: The Fightins.com

This is what happens when a tiny man gets a chip on his sloped shoulders and thinks he is more important than the game. It's bad enough that Greg Gibson blew Monday night's call. It is clearly obvious that Barry was still harboring quite a bit of kindergarten resentment against Ryan Howard. His body posture and the "intimidating glare" of his piggish little eyes at the first strike call spoke volumes to that.

But when he was asked to make the second call, and he hesitated just long enough to make eye contact with Howard before throwing his fist in the air, almost exulting in the call, you knew this hack was not even composed enough to call games at the high school level. Remember, this is the same genius who ejected RYAN ZIMMERMAN a few days before, a guy who had never once been ejected in his entire major league career. Perhaps Barry was bullied by a guy named Ryan in elementary school, who knows?

Something needs to be done in major league baseball about this ump specifically and MLB umpires in general. They are the most pompous, out of control, sycophantic group of officials in any major sport (with the possible exception of the World Cup refs), but that's another rant.

Scott "I really am a tough guy" Barry should get down on his knees and thank god that Polanco was able to stop Ryan Howard, normally the most laid back guy on the baseball diamond, next to Chase Utley that is. If Howard had not been restrained I think young Mr. Barry would still be picking turf out of his face.

Have a listen to the call by Scott Franzke and Larry Anderson, which I borrowed from one of my favorite Phillies blogs The Fightins.

Scott Barry is slated to be the second base ump for tonight's game. Should be interesting...

Larry Andersen hates Scott Barry by Mike Meech

Click HERE to see video of the whole mess on MLB.com.

And by the way...am I the only Phillies fan who wonders on a daily basis why Franzke and Anderson are not in the TV booth in stead of TMac and Wheels?? I now do with Phillies games what I always do with Eagle games. I mute the TV guys (Yes you, Joe Buck) so I can hear the radio guys.

The Father 100

Graphic by Chris @ Daddy Doctrines

OK dads (and interested moms). Time for another feature here at the chalkboard.

I am a big fan of flash fiction, love to read it and love to write it. It is fun to write and is excellent practice for making your writing more concise. So I got to thinking...I do flash fiction. Could there be such a thing as flash NON-fiction? 'Why not,' I said to myself. 'I think there could be and I think it could be a lot of fun. I also think I should stop talking to myself now.'

The result of this inner dialog?

THE FATHER 100!

The rules are simple. I will give you a word. Yes, that's right A word. As in one. Single. The cheese stands alone...you get the point.

You will have between now and midnight on Friday to write a one hundred word post inspired by that word. Entries can be less than one hundred words, but they cannot be more. Posts must focus on some aspect of parenting. Even though I call this the Father 100, moms are encouraged to join us!

Ninety words? Cool.

Ninety-eight? Awesome.

One hundred two? Sorry chief.

One hundred words (or less).

Write your post on your blog and then add your link to the linky tools below, just like for Father Friday.

Sometime over the course of the weekend I will read all the entries. Then I will pick the entry that I feel best does justice to the spirit of the given word. Some weeks I will have a guest do the judging so I can play as well.

This exercise is strictly for fun and also for good writing practice. As of this time no prizes will be offered. Should I win the lottery or score a successful reality series (Real Dads of Delaware...can you see it?) that may change, but for now the chosen author will have to content himself with the prideful swell of a job well done.

I think this can be a lot of fun. Who is in?

I will start off with an easy word in our inaugural Father 100. The first word is...

LOVE

Come on parents! Let's show the world how well we can write!

A Teacher's Wish List...

In about fifteen hours I will lace up my boots, secure my ropes, make sure I have my snake bite kit, and begin the ascent up the mountain that is my thirteenth year teaching fifth graders. The children themselves do not arrive until August thirtieth. This coming week will be full of getting my room together, planning out the first month or so, copying papers, getting to know names, and of course, hours of  meetings (and there was much rejoicing).

As I sit here on my comfortable couch, knowing that my hours of enjoying its summer comfort have now dwindled down to single digits, my thoughts turn to my wish list for the upcoming year. So, I wish...

I wish for a classroom full of motivated kids. As a teacher I am more concerned about day in, day out effort than I am about each child's ability level. I would rather have a roomful of academically weak kids who WANT to learn and work hard to achieve as much as they can than a roomful of academically strong kids who are apathetic. There is no moment more amazing in teaching then when a motivated child surprises herself with what can be accomplished when good, old fashioned effort is a part of the equation.

I wish for a group of parents that embrace a collaborative spirit. The education of their child does not take place only in the classroom between the hours of 8:30 to 3:30. I wish for parents that see education as a three part team sport, with equal parts of responsibility between student, teacher, and parents. The better team effort we have, with excellent communication between all parties, the better chance the student will have to make the needed progress.

I wish for opportunities to grow, both professionally and personally.

I wish for patience, more so with my own short comings than my students.

I wish for the humility to reach out to colleagues if I need advice or help with a problem and for the quick response to anything asked of me.

I wish for time. For enough time to meet the needs of each of my students. Children are like fingerprints, like snowflakes. No two are exactly the same. When they walk into my room next week I will have twenty-four or twenty-five amazingly unique individuals. Each one will arrive with their own individual cocktail of strengths and weaknesses, not just academically, but also socially, economically, and emotionally. Time is the most valuable commodity in a school day. I wish to have enough for each need to be fully met.

I wish for success for each child and for the ability to shut out all the voices clamoring about standardized test scores and adequate yearly progress. My main focus must be on the success of each student and remembering that success is not always measured exactly the same for every child. If I can help a student's individual skills and ability to grow, to prepare him to handle the rigors of middle school, pacing guides and national averages be damned, then I have done my job.

I wish to remember that there is more to teaching than worrying about state assessments, to remember to teach my students to think critically and logically when they are faced with a problem. To always see my learners as people, not dots or lines on a graph.

I wish to remember to always choose my words carefully when I talk to my students. I am the single greatest influence on the environment in my classroom. My words need to be positive, empowering, and compassionate. Months of trust between student and teacher can be blown to pieces with a careless or angry word.

I wish for a successful and empowering year for my colleagues; in my building, my state, my country, and the world, be they public school teachers like myself, private school teachers, or home schoolers. We are truly blessed to have the daily opportunity to touch the future, from the nervous first year kindergarten teacher to the seasoned thirty year high school veteran.

Lastly, I wish for good health and safety for all as we begin this climb together. Before we know it...it will be June.

Father Friday 2 - Best of the Week From Blogger Dads

Graphic by Chris @ Daddy Doctrines

Writing a lot about fatherhood on this blog has enabled me to reach out and meet a lot of very cool (and a few slightly unstable) dads who are writing blogs, twittering content, and making huge contributions to the body of work on excellent fathering that can be found on das internets.

Last week I started my first feature here at The Chalkboard. I was as nervous as a thirteen year old girl throwing her first party, anxious and scared that no one would come. Fortunately sixteen dads joined in, linking what they felt was their best post from the past week. And let me tell ya, there is some GOOD STUFF there. It became what I had hoped it would, a sort of "best of" album of funny and insightful dad written blog posts.

So here we are at week two. If you are a dad, join in! If you are a mom, and you feel you have written an absolutely awesome post this week, we don't practice discrimination here at The Chalkboard. Even though it says Father Friday, please jump in with us. The goal as always is to run a list of the best dads (and moms) have had to offer on their blogs this week.

Now, the guidelines...


1. You need to be a father. New father, old father, soon to be father, want some day to be a father, father...doesn't matter. You just need to be a dad. (Or a really awesome mom!)

2. You must own and maintain your own blog.

3. If you meet the requirements for rules one and two, look back over your posts from the past week, from Friday to Friday. Re-read them all.

4. Choose the post you feel was your particular BEST for the week. It can be funny, helpful, sad, dramatic, deep, light...whatever. Pick the post that most reflects you and what your awesome blog has to offer.

5. Follow the host. That's me. It's quick and painless and I always follow back. (This part is optional, but oh so appreciated!)

6. Put your blog address and a short description of the post in the Linky link located below. Be short but concise. (You know...like twitter!)

7. After you are on the list, surf the posts of the other dads and follow as many as you can. Read and above all else COMMENT! We all know that comments are to bloggers what a keg of Dear Park water is to a desert nomad.

8. Grab the code below, create a new post on your blog, and enter it so you can share the growing list with all your followers. Then just sit back and let it grow!


Pass the link around to your other blogger friends, RT on Twitter. Let's break the sixteen participants we made in our first week of operation. Special thanks to Chris over at The Daddy Doctrines for designing the amazingly groovy Father Friday badge! Feel free to grab it for your post.


Have a great weekend and remember, it takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man.


- Brian 

Branson, MO - An East Coast Perspective

The wise sage and American philosopher Homer Simpson once declared that Branson, Missouri is what Las Vegas would be like if it was run by Ned Flanders. The truth of that statement cannot be understated.

I had been to Branson before and as this was my third trip out, I knew that this time I was prepared…or so I thought. It seems, however, that an east coast boy such as myself can never be fully prepared for Branson. It is now apparent that I will always find things that surprise, and quite frankly scare, me.

An example, perhaps?

Box cutters Optional…

On Saturday we braved the one hundred plus degree Missouri heat and went with The Wife’s family to an amusement park called Silver Dollar City. I grew up on the east coast going to amusement parks like Hershey Park, Six Flags, Dorney Park, and King’s Dominion. Silver Dollar City is quite similar to these parks…if they were suddenly taken over and run one day by the cast of the Beverley Hillbillies. Banjo music and steel guitars blare out of the fake rocks that are actually speakers placed strategically around the grounds. Character actors amble about the park dressed in nineteenth century gold digger garb. Succotash is cooked in fifty foot wide frying pans and sold alongside common amusement park fair such as hamburgers and hot dogs.

In spite of the banjos (and the Succotash), Silver Dollar City is a great place to take the family. The park workers are a thousand times nicer then amusement park workers on the east coast, most of whom glare at you as you walk around the park, as if they resent the fact that you are breathing and, on top of that, have the gall to take your family out for a day of fun in their park and force them to deal with you. The rides are decent and the food is pretty good. The thing that surprised me most about Silver Dollar City is that we were not searched upon entering. People carrying large bags, large enough to carry caches of automatic weapons and improvised explosives, were pushed right through the gates. No bag searches, no pat downs. 

As The Wife, The Peanut, my mother-in-law, and I were standing in a fairly long and sweaty line to ride the water flume, I saw something I had never seen before in an amusement park.

There was a family of four in front of us, mom, dad, sister, brother. They were all wearing the same color shirts bearing the logo of their family reunion. The father, a large beefy guy with hairy arms and thick side burns that stopped just short of his long goatee, was complaining to his wife about the fact that his t-shirt wasn’t sleeveless and it was “bothering the bejesus” out of him. She reached into the large pocket of his massive cargo shorts and pulled out a gleaming silver object. With a Wolverine like snikt she thumbed open a five inch box cutter and began performing sleeve removal surgery right there in the line. Out in the open, making no attempt at stealth, she wielded an instrument that would have gotten her detained at some amusement parks I have been to and flat out arrested in others. She sliced off the left sleeve, revealing a hairy shoulder, then switched and quickly dispatched the right. When she was finished she picked up the amputated sleeves, sheathed the blade on the box cutter, and returned them to her husband’s shorts. As she was turning around after stowing her husband’s sharp edged weapon she caught my eye. She must have read the confused look in my eye (which, given the agape nature of my lower jaw, was not too difficult to ascertain).

“Well,” she said with a grin, “ya never know, do ya?”

“Yes’um,” I returned with a tip of my cap, not wanting to antagonize her or her husband, whose cold steel eyes took me in from underneath the frayed brim of his camouflaged baseball hat.

And the banjos played on...

When we go back to Branson in two years I have to take a video camera. People here on the east coast just don't believe me.

One Hundred Word Challenge - Failed

The Collector

Solid footfalls stopping outside the hotel room door. A shadow blocking the light from the weak hallway bulb. My whiskey soaked breath making me sick. ESPN on the cheap TV, replaying the final highlights of the game again and again.

Showing the buzzer beater. The impossible shot. The one chance in a million.

The money.

Gone.

A single knock at the door. No need to ask who it is. No strength in my legs to open it.

No matter.


A rustle of clothing. A soft click as the safety is switched from on to off.

It will all be over soon.

The challenge? Take a single word each week, handed out by Velvet Verbosity, and create a 100 word piece of flash fiction. It is a lot of fun. Join in if you are up for it (it's not as easy as it sounds!)

Father Friday - Best of the Week from Blogger Dads

I was hanging out at the new, best hashtag on Twitter (#dadstalking) today.

Yeah, I know, at first glance it looks like Dad Stalking (which, let's be honest, is pretty creepy) and not what it should be pronounced as, Dads Talking. But don't let that get in the way. It is an awesome place where dads can talk, tell stories, commiserate, share a beer, and much more. Its like a huge virtual bar, without the smoke, the bad lighting, or the horrible cover bands.

I was only able to spend about an hour there today, but what an hour. As I interacted with dads from around the country (and the globe) I began looking at their blogs and realized that sadly, I did not have time to read all the great dad writing going on out there in Blogtopia. There are some truly awesome guys who are using their considerable writing skills to describe the ins and outs of this joyous responsibility called fatherhood. For every post I read, I know I am missing dozens of equally awesome ones.

That's when it occurred to me that if there was some way to read what each dad thought was his best, funniest, most helpful, most touching blog post from the past week, then I wouldn't be missing any of it. I would have a sort of "greatest hits" album each week of the best the small army of Dad Bloggers out there have to offer.

And just like that, with a puff of smoke and the draining of a Summer Lager, Father Friday - Best of the Week, was born. The rules for participation are quite simple.

1. You need to be a father. New father, old father, soon to be father, want some day to be a father, father...doesn't matter. You just need to be a dad.

2. You must own and maintain your own blog.

3. If you meet the requirements for rules one and two, look back over your posts from the past week, from Friday to Friday. Re-read them all.

4. Choose the post you feel was your particular BEST for the week. It can be funny, helpful, sad, dramatic, deep, light...whatever. Pick the post that most reflects you and what your awesome blog has to offer.

5. Follow the host. That's me. It's quick and painless and I always follow back.

6. Put your blog address and a short description of the post in the Linky link located below. Be short but concise.

7. After you are on the list, surf the posts of the other dads and follow as many as you can. Read and above all else COMMENT! We all know that comments are to bloggers what a keg of Dear Park water is to a desert nomad.

8. Grab the code below, create a new post on your blog, and enter it so you can share the growing list with all your followers. Then just sit back and let it grow!

That is it in a nutshell. Since this idea was literally just hatched a few hours ago, I have not yet had the chance to create a button to display on your site, should you so choose, but I will. It is my hope that this will take off and that each week we can have dozens, if not hundreds, of links leading the weary web traveler to the best of what dads have to offer from their blogs for the past week.

Happy linking and be sure to TELL YOUR FRIENDS!